Parenting 101 – Skit 4

Posted by on Dec 21, 2003 in Parenting

Dr. Philip Ney

What’s the matter with the stupid machine?

Jake and Mabel

J       Hey Mabel! What’s the matter with this stupid machine? It won’t start.

M     Jack, maybe you should try using the right keys.

J       Look Mabel, they are all cars. They have four wheels haven’t they? Why should I have to         have different keys?

M     Jake, they’re different, that’s why. What are you doing with all that lumber piled up on top         of my beetle? You’ve got half a ton of two by fours.

J       Yeah, so what?

M     Jake, it doesn’t look right. Besides, I wanted to go shopping.

J       Mabel, you can take my truck. Yeah, the ten tonner.

M     Jake, you’ve got to be kidding. I go shopping in your ten-ton truck and you are going to         carry lumber on my beetle.

J       Yeah, well, if you don’t want to take the truck, you can use my tractor.

M     Jake, what is the matter with you? Can’t you see they are different? You can’t use the         same machine to do different things.

J       They’ve all got wheels don’t they? They have engines, brakes, tires, so what is the big         difference.

M     Use your eyes and your headman, for something else than to carry that stupid looking         toque of yours.

J       Now Mabel, don’t go on about my toque. It is a perfectly good toque my mother knit it for         me forty years ago. Yeah, she’s got a few holes, but she keeps out most of the weather.

Later

J       That stupid beetle of yours went ½ mile then quit. I couldn’t make it do a thing!! It’s         retarded!!

M     Jake, that beetle isn’t stupid. You are. Can’t you see it isn’t designed to carry lumber? If         you don’t believe your eyes, then make measurements.

J       Aw, I guess you’re right. Where is my tape measure? Why are women always right,         even when they aren’t?

M     Not that kind of measurement Jake. We’re always right because we’re smarter.