ISN’T SHE BEAUTIFUL- A play on words

Posted by on Feb 9, 2015 in Satires, Uncategorized

  1. Isn’t she beautiful Players: G= God     J= Jesus. HS= Holy Spirit
  2. Much like her mother.
  3. How old now Michael?
  4. I would say about 12 wks.
  5. More precisely, 84 days, 4 hrs, 15 min. and 42 sec. plus or minus a few millisecs.
  6. Smiling at His beloved son. Where is his dad?
  7. Over there, behind that tree weeping his heart out.
  8. Hey man, get over there and love your woman.

Larry. Oh God I don’t know where you are but don’t let her do this.

G Do what young man?

  1. Who said that? I must be hearing voices. My Doc said I would if I stopped my meds.
  2. Do what young man?
  3. This is weird but I may as well talk to myself. It couldn’t get any worse. When I said ‘I really wanted to marry you’, she said ‘go to hell’. You are a rapist and I will never marry you’. But I didn’t rape her. We were both drunk and she raped me about as much as I raped her. But no one listens to men these days. So I took off, far away. As far as I could tell she was going to have me charged. But when I heard she was pregnant with my child I came back as fast as I could.  I proposed like a gentleman.  She kicked me in the teeth literally and figuratively
  4. Why don’t you try once more?

L  Now who in the h. is that?  Now I know I gotta go to the emergency and ask them to lock me up.

  1. Look young man you have little to lose except your pride. You might save your baby’s life.
  2. Oh, God don’t tell me she’s going to abort my son. Yes I’m sure it is a boy.
  3. I’m afraid it is true. Don’t look now but she is headed for the clinic.
  4. Clinic nothing. That place is a hell hole
  5. It is a short cut to hades for sure.

Holy Spirit (HS).” Don’t do it Angie. Please don’t do it. For God’s sake and yours and hers and his. Don’t kill this special beautiful child.”

  1. Why not? I got my rights. This brat will probably turn out just like his rapist dad. If I can spare the world some grief from a rapist, I have no qualms. My mum was raped just like me. If you are God,  tell me why do tragedies keep repeating. You gave us choice God so I can choose abortion if I want to, right? This is a pretty good set up. I exercise my rights, stop bad history repeating and kill a rapist all in one blow. I guess I’m a hero.
  2. But she didn’t abort you.
  3. The way my life has been going, mum should have terminated me before I first saw the light of day. (Screaming) I don’t want to live but I’m too scared to die.
  4. I would like to help you.
  5. Yeah Yeah. They told me about you in Sunday School. If that’s you, Jesus, get me out of this mess right now.
  6. You start by getting down on your knees.
  7. Here, now, with all my friends looking on? You have got to be joking Jesus…… Well, you just helped me make up my mind. Now where did I put that clinic phone number?

Rasping voice in the background.  S. Way to go Angie. That’s my girl.  I’ll meet you there.

  1. Shouting, heaven and earth shaking. Michael, Get the worm out of here. Now!
  2. Not so fast your illustrious majesty. I know my rights too. I know it won’t be long but you can’t put me down just yet. (In an audible whisper) And you won’t this time. I have a much bigger, smarter army, mostly the bitter spirits of aborted babies and they are itching to fight you God. They are so mad you allowed abortion and didn’t give them a chance. (More loudly) I’m ready any time you are oh! Most Holly One.
  3. You aren’t very bright Lucifer. If you think you can trick me into giving away my top secret.
  4. No, but Jesus will tell me won’t you old pal? Last time we had a little chat back in time, you almost did, didn’t you?
  5. Last time S. I could not tell because I didn’t know when. God only knows how close I came to bowing before you. But thank God, a miss is as big as a mile.
  6. Jesus you now understand why I didn’t tell you the date of my return to earth. I gave you a choice. If I had told you my top secret and you had chosen to follow It, I would have had to really scramble and many people would have died.
  7. You are really prochoice aren’t you God my father?
  8. Prochoice is the name of the game these foolish humans are playing but killing preborn babies is definitely not my aim. I really want trillions of people to choose me to be their best friend. So I set up the human universe full of choices, hoping they would choose me. I even allowed satan to be the alternative. I kept myself quite hidden behind various curtains and paradoxes so the odds were about 50:50.
  9. You are incredibly wise my God. But it looks like the odds favour S. because right now he has far more followers than you do.
  10. Looks are deceiving dear loyal old Michael.
  11. Hang on a minute. You are far older than I am. God.

Oh my God do something quick. She is climbing onto that table.

  1. Oh no you don’t Doctor. Angie has just changed her mind haven’t you my sweetheart? So just give me that shiny weapon. We are definitely leaving.

Doc to nurse, Hold her down. I don’t get paid unless we have a take. ‘And you (receptionist) call the cops,’ while trying to wrestle A. back onto the operating table. He is losing to Larry who is a college team star rugby player and cannot be moved very easily.

  1. Well Doc, the cops are already here. I called them and they now have a video of you trying to force a woman to have an abortion. You were about to invade her body with no medical indication and you were disregarding her choice to change her mind.

Doc.  Groaning loudly, I’m ruined.

God, Jesus and Michael together,  Nice work HS. What did you say to her?

  1. I suggested Larry tell her that he still wanted to marry her and together they could start sorting out the tangled conflicts of being an abortion survivor. It just so happened that a good friend of mine was going by and he gave Larry a business card for Mt Joy College which has a counselling program for abortion survivors.

FINI.                 P. Ney

Meta tags:  Abortion, Clinic, God, Partner, Hell, Abortion Survivors, Preborn baby, satan, choice, Jesus, Holy Spirit.